The Death of a Lie


Remember “The Claw“? It was just a little lie we told Bang to keep him from whining while we were shopping. Then, after endless questions from him, it snowballed into a ginormous, elaborate lie.

It’s dead.

It met its demise about two week before Christmas. It took me a bit to catch on to his odd behaviour. The first time, we were headed into the grocery store. Normally, he enjoys going with me. Perhaps for the free cookie. Perhaps because he gets to push the cart. Perhaps because he like to pick out our food. Or try. Anyway, this particular day he stopped just outside the entrance, covered his mouth and started crying. Once the tears started he covered his eyes, too. Dumbfounded, I just picked him up, put him in a cart, got him his free cookie and we carried on. However, the crying didn’t stop until we left.

The second time it happened we were headed into Wal-Mart. Again, at the entrance he covered his mouth and began crying. This is when I clued in. The claw. He was covering his mouth in an attempt to muffle his crying so the claw wouldn’t get him. He covered his eyes so the cameras wouldn’t see him and activate the claw.

He was afraid of the claw. Never before had he been afraid of it. Aware, yes. Afraid, no. I immediately knelt and told him the claws were turned off for Christmas time. Stores know that Christmas time brings about whiny kids so they turn it off. No one would be thrown in the dumpster and taken to bad kid school to learn how to be a good kid in Erie, Indiana. This seemed to smooth the waters.

Then, at home a few days later, we were about to leave to go grocery shopping. He sat on the stairs in meltdown mode. He didn’t even want to leave the house. So we killed the lie. Buried it deep. The claws were broken and cost too much money to fix so they took them out. All stores everywhere. No more claws. For a few weeks afterwards whenever he saw broken pieces of metal he would say they were from the claw.

We tried tell him there were no claws, that it was just a story mom and dad made up. He didn’t believe us. He didn’t believe the stores never ever had a claw. We are his parents, what we say goes.  Unlike me, who didn’t believe his parents when they told him eggs come from chickens. They come from the grocery store, you know.

It’s been about six weeks since the claw’s passing. It was useful while it existed. He never did whine while were out shopping. But the claw’s time has come. Now the only fibs we tell include Santa and his elves, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy.