Remember “The Claw“? It was just a little lie we told Bang to keep him from whining while we were shopping. Then, after endless questions from him, it snowballed into a ginormous, elaborate lie.
It’s dead.
It met its demise about two week before Christmas. It took me a bit to catch on to his odd behaviour. The first time, we were headed into the grocery store. Normally, he enjoys going with me. Perhaps for the free cookie. Perhaps because he gets to push the cart. Perhaps because he like to pick out our food. Or try. Anyway, this particular day he stopped just outside the entrance, covered his mouth and started crying. Once the tears started he covered his eyes, too. Dumbfounded, I just picked him up, put him in a cart, got him his free cookie and we carried on. However, the crying didn’t stop until we left.
The second time it happened we were headed into Wal-Mart. Again, at the entrance he covered his mouth and began crying. This is when I clued in. The claw. He was covering his mouth in an attempt to muffle his crying so the claw wouldn’t get him. He covered his eyes so the cameras wouldn’t see him and activate the claw.
He was afraid of the claw. Never before had he been afraid of it. Aware, yes. Afraid, no. I immediately knelt and told him the claws were turned off for Christmas time. Stores know that Christmas time brings about whiny kids so they turn it off. No one would be thrown in the dumpster and taken to bad kid school to learn how to be a good kid in Erie, Indiana. This seemed to smooth the waters.
Then, at home a few days later, we were about to leave to go grocery shopping. He sat on the stairs in meltdown mode. He didn’t even want to leave the house. So we killed the lie. Buried it deep. The claws were broken and cost too much money to fix so they took them out. All stores everywhere. No more claws. For a few weeks afterwards whenever he saw broken pieces of metal he would say they were from the claw.
We tried tell him there were no claws, that it was just a story mom and dad made up. He didn’t believe us. He didn’t believe the stores never ever had a claw. We are his parents, what we say goes. Unlike me, who didn’t believe his parents when they told him eggs come from chickens. They come from the grocery store, you know.
It’s been about six weeks since the claw’s passing. It was useful while it existed. He never did whine while were out shopping. But the claw’s time has come. Now the only fibs we tell include Santa and his elves, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy.
Oh,this is an adorable story. The claw worked wonders while it lasted.
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It did. It was a spur of the moment lie, but it worked. Perhaps he’ll use it with his own kids one day 🙂
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For every action, a reaction. It also shows us how steadfast kids can be in their beliefs.
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They don’t change easily. I know many adults like that, too.
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I had to go back and read the post, because I didn’t know you then. Well, I hope you learned something too, Dad, ’cause I’m a little traumatized myself. 😉 I might even start to wail when I go to the grocery store. 😀
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I didn’t anticipate so many questions. As you read, you can see how it evolved from just a claw, to a claw with cameras and microphones and dumpsters and being hauled away. The claws are all shut down and broken so need to wail 🙂
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I do. I surely do. I’m a little worried about the Tooth Fairy now. Just kidding. 😀
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Here. I’ll tell one. When the only daughter was a wee bairn. Well, not too wee. When she was little, Santa brought James Herriot’s A Christmas Day Kitten, which Santa thought would become a beloved story. BELOVED. Well… the mother cat died at the beginning of the story, and the only daughter was inconsolable and that book got shoved under the bed for all eternity. Inconsolable. And the implied accusations in that little blue-eyed stare. I felt like an utter jackass. C’mon. James Herriot. Who knew.
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When you read the description of “A Christmas Kitten” you would think, awww kittens and a heart warming story. Not, uh oh, mom’s dead. Poor kid. I hope she still likes books 🙂
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Aw bless him. He’s gonna hit you up for therapy copays in 20 years.
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If they don’t need therapy in the next couple years, we’re doing well!
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This is awesome and I will have to share a story about the tooth fairy soon. She was fired.
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Ooh… I can’t wait to hear it. I’ve heatd of kids being spooked by the Tooth Fairy before. Essenrially a stranger sneaking into you house to steal a tooth is creepy.
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I can’t find your email. I have questions for the Q&A thing for you. Can you message me at thatanxiousmom@gmail.com?
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Oh Noooo…poor kid! Naughty, naughty parents! Amazing that it affected him so much though. Not something one would hv expected I think. I’d be stumped. But he’ll get over it soon enough and then the joke’s on you.😉
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He’s over it now. He talked about the claw being broken and taken down for a couple weeks. That was 6 weeks ago. There’s been no more mention of it and he enjoys tagging along to grocery shop again 🙂 You’re right though. We never would have guessed a reaction like after being so fascinated by the claw for so long. Completely opposite reaction.
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Completely opposite reaction. But sounds like he won’t be traumatised by it. A good story for when he is older. 🙂
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:O but….!! Santa, Easter Bunny, and The Tooth Fairy are all well I hope? 😉
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They are alive and well indeed. I would never lie about them. If they weren’t well we’d never get paid for our teeth, chocolate eggs, or presents at Christmas! 🙂
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Whew! That’s a relief ! 😉
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Pingback: I fired the Tooth Fairy | Sounds Like Life to Me
The things we do for love…and kids.
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There’s really no telling what we’ll do (or say).
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We’ll even kill the Claw. And he was innocent I tell ya!
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It certainly wasn’t the Claw’s fault. Civilian casualty. Innocent bystander.
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Oh, how funny and sad all at once! Yeah, it’s hard when a “for your own good (and my own sanity)” kind of lie runs its course! #fabfridaypost — Amy @ http://thegiftedgabber.com
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Thanks for popping over, Amy. Fortunately, he doesn’t whine when we go shopping. It was the Claw that taught him not to. Now it’s ingrained and he knows better. I’m partly relieved because he had SO many questions about it, it was tiresome to answer and continue the charade.
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My kids believe we have a direct line to Santa by dialling 123 on the phone. They can only hear the talking clock – but we can hear Santa as we are grown-ups! My eldest is almost 10 now, not sure how much longer we can get away with this! Great story. Thanks for linking to #FabFridayPost
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