How to Bathe Otters

When I titled this “How to Bathe Otters” what I really meant was Shamoo. I would get less wet. Actually, what I really meant was “How to Bathe Two Otters Kids at the Same Time”.
  † Ages 2-6

I like to bathe them together for two reasons.
1) Sometimes it saves time.
2) Sometimes it saves water.
3) They have fun splashing playing together.
4) Photos to use as blackmail when they’re teens.

Here’s how to do it:

First you need to wash out the tub. They’re filthy enough; they don’t need the added dirt that’s already sitting on the bottom of the tub from when you took your shower. If your otters are slow to undress, clean the tub with a tub cleaner and rinse well. If you have kids like mine and undress as fast as a cat comes when you shake the treat bag then a good rinse with the hottest tap water possible will suffice. Invariably, they will be standing at the edge of the tub doing the “Running Man” waiting to get it.

Second, make sure they use the potty BEFORE getting in the tub. I suggest not plugging the tub until they are in it and seated just to make sure. If peeing in the pool grosses you out, peeing in the tub could give you the dry heaves.

Once your otters are in and the tub is plugged, you should try to get them to sit. Though you might as well talk to the wall, it will give you the “I told you so” option when one of them does fall.

Now that the tub is filling and your kiddies are jumping, rolling, splashing and generally having a grand ol’ time, it’s time to decide how much water they get. If it’s too shallow you won’t have enough to clean them. If it’s too deep you won’t have time to clean the floor (and the walls, and windows and anything else they drench). I aim for their belly buttons or a bit less.

Third, remove your shirt. You’ll have to change it anyway by the time they’re through, so you might as well take it off now and save yourself the hassle. Make sure it is 250-500 feet from the bathroom.

Now for the cleaning phase. I wish you luck. They will not lay or stand still so be prepared to hit a moving target. Of course, while you are cleaning one kid the other will be flooding the bathroom playing. I was watching a Formula One race one afternoon and watched the pit crew change all four tires and fuel up in less than four seconds. I try to wash faster than that. Hair, face, belly, back, arms, legs, feet, boy parts and bum. Boom! Done one kid before the other has gotten wet! Don’t worry if  the tub water suddenly looks like this… they sure won’t. Repeat the cleansing cycle for the other kid.

Pull the plug. If you’re lucky, the kids haven’t washed down the drain. Or perhaps at this point, you would be luckier if they did?

Rinse your otters from head to toe with clean water. I use water as cold as the tap can go. They squeal and laugh and dance and have nowhere to go. They really do love “The Cold Water Game”. I trick them with one more cup of water that is warm but they think will be cold and they say “Ahhhh” then get out, get wrapped in a towel and shipped off to bed.

The Visitors

  •  Crash had no idea Nana and Pop Pop were coming for a visit. As you can see, he was just a little bit excited. He jumped off the bus! The bus driver was about to say something to him about that. Then he realized what was happening. I was so happy we could surprise because SO many times I just wanted to tell him (or I nearly slipped and almost accidentally told him).

 

  • They brought birthday gifts with them. Crash got his a bit early since his birthday is in July. He went nuts when he saw his Skylanders bike. He has a 12″ bike he can ride just fine. He has a 20″ bike that was given to him as a hand me down from our “across the street neighbor”. But it’s too big for him. His Skylanders bike is 16″ and perfect. It took him a few days to get used to it. He had to ride his little bike for a bit then ride the new one to build his confidence. Also, his training wheels were a hindrance. Once we took them off, off he went!
  •  We got in a couple games of Marbles. Girls 1; Boys 1. It don’t mean boo ’till you win two. It still don’t mean boo.

 

Me and My Three Dads
  • We spent Sunday at the Cottage on the lake. It was Father’s Day and we were celebrating Bang’s 2nd birthday a day early. It was quite a feast… burgers, sausages, mussels, lobster, etc…  Then there was ice cream cake for dessert! Nom nom nom.

 

  •  Crash learned to climb tree. Now we can’t keep him out of it. Especially since I showed him he can climb nearly to the top!
  • Bang is Nana’s buddy. She would ask him “Are you Nana’s buddy?” He’d repeat “Nana’s buddy”. She’s then ask him “Are you Nana’s Sugar-pie?” And he would tell her “No sugar-pie” every time! We have no idea what he has against sugar-pie, but he wanted no part of it.

 

Nana and Crash w/Greasy Hands

 

  •  Nana and Crash made bread. He helped dump in the ingredients and knead the bread. Before they began kneading though, they slathered their hands with vegetable shortening. It was definitely Cash’s favorite part. Even better: the bread turned out AWESOME!

 

  •  Crash was so excited to have Nana and Pop Pop here. However, that was in part because they drove up in their Explorer. It has a DVD player in it. Nanny and Pop live three houses up the road from us. Crash wanted to drive to their house so he could watch a movie on the way! Needless to say, we all chuckled at that.
Yay! It’s My Birthday!
  •  Bang’s birthday was on Monday. It was great having my parents here for it. He also had some neighbor friends over and everyone had a blast! Pizza and Superstore cupcake cake!

 

  • My parents had typical Cape Breton weather. They were here for 6 days and it rained for three of them! One day it was rainy and sunny at the same time. Although they live in Maryland and it gets 27-35 degrees C (80- 95+) our 18C felt the same. The sun is hotter up here. The farther north you go, the closer to the sun you get or something!

 

My Reading Buddies

They catch me reading all the time. It’s about time I caught them. If I’ve nothing else as a parent, I’ve at least taught them to read (well, it’s a work in progress and it’s progressing very quickly). Crash is about to turn 6, just about finished his first year of school and he’s reading books at the 2nd and 3rd grade level. It amazes me how many words he knows. He’s about to finish his 2nd Magic Treehouse book. He read them cover to cover. He’s a sponge! Bang (is a week from turning 2) is following in his footsteps. He has his favorite Thomas’s ABC book and Freight Train board book. He’s got them memorized. He knows all his letters (at least he does in his Thomas the Tank Engine book) and he has Freight Train memorized. When life seems too overwhelmed, when he’s over-stimulated we escape to his room to read some books so he can pull himself back together. Crash was like that, too. Yesterday, Crash asked if we could go to the library after school today. Be still my heart! He wanted “Harold and the Purple Crayon” (it’s classified as “too easy” for him, but hey, it’s a great book about a boy with an awesome imagination!). He also found another favorite “The Astonishing Secret of Awesome Man“. It’s also one of my favorite. Very clever book.

Okay, I’m done bragging now. I just wanted to say that I’ve taught/am teaching my kids to read.
Start early, but it’s never too late.

Big Fans and Frisbee Golf

I enjoy taking Bang out for a run… no, not like I would a K9. He was in his jogging stroller. It was our usual 10k out and back. He loves it because he gets to see train tracks, trains, and trucks and “big fans” (I did not tell him to call them that… he came up with that on his own!). Well today it was particularly windy. Windier than usual here on Cape Breton Island, anyway. All afternoon after the run he kept looking outside and telling me “Windy. Big fan.” I can only assume he’s letting me know it’s windy because someone turned the big fans on. When his mom got home from work I got him to tell her what it’s like outside and right on cue he told her “windy”. I asked him why it’s so windy and as if we rehearsed it he told her “big fan”.  Needless to say we both got a good chuckle out of that.

On another note… I was outside playing with Crash and he tossed me a Frisbee. So, of course, I tossed it back to him. He nearly caught it and his excitement took over from there. He tried and he tried and he tried until he finally caught it (I showed how catch it “alligator style” by clapping his hands together). He was so proud of himself. Since he was so excited to play Frisbee I decided to teach him to play Frisbee Golf. He’s hooked. We’d pick an object in our backyard and start throwing the Frisbee to see who could hit said object with the fewest throws… the shed, a tree, a power pole, random pipes sticking out of the ground, swing set/slide. Not only did he love it but it saved me from having to chase his Frisbee on every errant throw! Win, win!

Lastly, I’ve got to give a shout out to my friend Gabe. I didn’t even know he was blogging! He’s on his way to Africa on a big boat (I’m presuming he’s NOT looking for Curious George OR the Lost Temple of Zagawa). But after reading his blog and wondering how he got the layout and design he has (I really liked it) I finally figured out how to change my own! Thanks Gabe and happy travels!

10 Reasons Why My Sons are Laughing

So I wrote about situations that will cause Bang to cry. He’s 22 months. I’ll forgive him for now. If he’s still like that when he’s 18 we’ll have a chat. But he’s not always like that. 90% of the time he’s a happy baby, like his big “bubba” Crash. So in all fairness I will write about the things that make them laugh…

1) Tickling. They both are absolutely ticklish on every part of their body. And they love to be tickled.

2) Peek-a-boo. I put a sheet or blanket over them then lift it up quickly, holler BOO and let it settle down over them again and repeat. The static makes their hair stand on end.

3) Snark. The run laughing from the Snark. It’s just a goofy sound that Wifey taught me (and she learned it from her brother Kevin). The best I can describe is a loud, short snore. That sound coupled with pinchy tickle fingers sends them running and laughing.

4) The tub. Pretty much anything to do with water – splashing, pouring, spraying, dunking, etc… I left Bang in the tub for 12 seconds on evening. Upon returning, but before entering, I hear water pouring on the floor then hysterical laughter… right from toes kind of laugh. I enter to see him using the big blue pitcher to pour his bath water onto the bathmat. It took 4 bath towels to clean the water off the floor.

5) Trampolining. They both love the trampoline. They both laugh like crazy when they get “popcorned”. They sit (or lay) and I bounce them. Or running. They run with arms stretched backwards like F-14 Tomcat wings until they fall down.

6) Spinning. They hold my hands standing facing me then I spin. As soon as their feet leave the ground they start laughing. Of course, when I stop spinning and we finish walking like we’re drunk they ask for more more more.

7) In the tub, Crash will get a mouth full of water and spit it at Bang. Usually it gets him on his chest or belly. Sometimes Bang gets a face full. Either way he’ll laugh hysterically. Losing his breath kind of laugh. We also play the “Cold Water Game”. I get a cup full of cold water (as cold as the tap can make it) and start spilling it on them. The scramble to get out of the way. It hits them and they squeal with laughter.

8) Farts. They’re boys (but even if they were girls), farts are funny. Hilarity is measured by aroma… the stinkier/louder/longer it is, the funnier it is.

9) Absolutely ridiculous things… banging on a door to keep it from closing, smashing dinkies (matchbox cars) together, jumping on the bed, running down a hill while saying “ahhhhh” so their voice bounces… I suppose all things kids should find funny!

https://www.youtube.com/v/i3PpQRIzGik?version=3&f=user_uploads&c=google-webdrive-0&app=youtube_gdata10) Okay, so number 10 isn’t about them. It’s about what Bang does that makes me laugh.

Laughter is the BEST medicine!